Get paid to be rich
From the Blog PkColumnist.com: Advertorial: Get paid to be rich - Want to lead a luxurious lifestyle without paying any tax? Fed up of being expected to account for your wealth? Well, we at Rabbani, Gillani, Sheikh, Tareen & Co., (RGST & Co.) have the answer. We are proud to bring you the opulence of Park Lane without the oppression of taxation in the Principality of Parkistan, known as "The Enclave of the Rich", an autonomous entity exclusively for the rich landed elite. It should not to be confused with the surrounding Republic of Pakistan, also known as "the Land of the Poor". RGST & Co. bring you prime tracts of land, in beautiful Parkistan, providing the luxury, comfort and excellence you and your wealth deserve with a privilege available nowhere else in the world. Other jurisdictions tax the wealthy more than the poor. In Parkistan, thanks to RGST & Co. we are proud to say that being rich shouldn't cost you a penny. Because rich people have the right to be rich, stay rich and get richer. All you need to do to qualify for this amazing opportunity is to become an "agriculturist". Yes, it really is that simple. All your income will instantaneously become tax free and it's absolutely 100 per cent legal! Sounds too good to be true, doesn't it? Well just hear what satisfied clients have to say: "Hello — I am Chaudhry Malik — I am a wealthy businessman with large land holdings. In any other country, I would have to pay up to 50 per cent income tax. But in Parkistan, I just show all my income as "agricultural", so even though I earn millions of dollars, own sprawling estates and live in opulence, I pay only $80 in tax — and that's just some paltry land tax. Thank you RGST & Co. You make being wealthy profitable." What's more, not only will you be exempt from income tax — you actually get paid money too. Oh yes! Poor Pakistan's government will pay you fertiliser, fuel and input subsidies as well as superb support prices. So you actually make money at both ends…. with subsidised inputs and tax-free income. It couldn't get any better! However, all we ask of you is that when you are a member of Parkistan you always deny its lucrative privileges, to protect the sanctity of this exclusive tax haven for the rich. This haven is strictly for the rich, landed elite. But even though Parkistan is exclusive to you, you need not be committed to Parkistan. We offer attractive dual residence packages — our most preferred location is Canada (three year process), followed by the United States (green card or business residency) and Dubai (immediate residency). Most of you will wish to maintain a portfolio of prime residences in these locations and we recommend doing so. The Principality's rich-friendly policies and tax-free status are occasionally subject to frivolous attacks by the courts and media but, to date, none of our wealthy residents has been prosecuted, audited or held accountable and we expect that trend to continue. Still not convinced? Well here is an exclusive offer you cannot afford to miss! If you are one of the next 100 wealthy politicians to join us at RGST & Co. — in addition to guaranteed tax-free income AND huge subsidies AND generous support prices we will also give you absolutely FREE — a massive loan write-off. But hurry — this offer ends soon. Just make sure you have "borrowed" upwards of Rs 1 billion from any Pakistani bank and we will take care of the rest. Most of our partners have had an average of Rs3 billion written off — or "rescheduled" permanently — as we like to put it. It pays to be rich but now you can get paid to be rich! Welcome to Parkistan! Where the "r" stands for rich! RGST & Co. are proud to be partners of IMF Inc. Global Subservience UnLimited. Disclaimer: The above offer expires in three months. In the event of riots, rebellion or an Act of God, RGST & Co. may withdraw this offer and shall not be held liable for any loss, damage or suffering resulting thereof. . Read Full Post
Challenges for Obama — I
From the Blog PkColumnist.com: Challenges for Obama — I - In Third World countries like Pakistan, when leaders find the going tough on the domestic front, they turn towards foreign policy pursuits, ultimately losing at both ends. This is precisely the case with US President Barack Obama now. Domestic problems are multiplying. The government favours the elite and ignores the common folk. It has tried to stimulate the economy by buying treasury bonds through "quantitative easing", which itself is a cause of a political backlash, and is following a risky monetary strategy which has in turn caused high rates of unemployment. Change in healthcare reforms are the only silver lining in the dark clouds surrounding America's economy. Its foreign policy is drifting into error because of the failure to acknowledge the great setback suffered at the hands of the Afghans in the New Great Game in Eurasia. After the breakup of the Soviet Union, the US decided to extend its global primacy and pre-eminence into the Euro-Asian region under the mistaken belief that the 21st century belonged to it, as the dominant global power. The 'New Great Game' thus focused on containing and curbing forces considered a threat to its global ambitions. First, the Americans betrayed the Afghan Mujahideen — who had won the war for them against the Soviets — and induced a civil war because a radical Islamic government in Afghanistan was considered a threat to their interests. Hastily, they took on the Iraqis in 1991, who had emerged stronger after the Iran-Iraq war destroyed the bulk of their armed forces. They turned towards Somalia and encouraged their neighbours to invade the country and brought about a regime change. While the 'New Great Game' was being implemented, the 9/11 attack filled American hearts with a thirst for revenge. Afghanistan was invaded and occupied because it had committed the unforgivable sin of sheltering Osama, whom the Americans themselves had funded and supported against the Soviets. After consolidating their hold over Afghanistan, Iraq was invaded on the pretext that Saddam had developed atomic weapons. As the consolidation process continued in Afghanistan and Iraq, the European Union extended its membership into Eastern Europe and jointly brought about pro-West revolutions in Georgia, Ukraine and Kyrghyzstan. Thereafter, Afghanistan was unilaterally declared as part of South Asia and India was assigned a role under a strategic partnership with the US, with the objective of containing the rising threat of Islamic extremism in the region and the rising economic and military power of China. In the process of implementing this strategy, the Americans and their allies miserably failed because they could not estimate the power of the Islamic Resistance and suffered humiliating defeat at their hands. This happened because of the 'war on terror strategy', which became the catalyst for the spread of the Islamic Resistance from Afghanistan to Iraq, Somalia, Yemen, Pakistan, Kashmir and Palestine. President Obama's recent visit to India and America and India's joint declaration shows disregard for the emerging ground realities. The Taliban have won the war and have proved true to their resolve, as conveyed to us in March 2002 by Mullah Omar. "We have resolved to fight and fight till we were free to take our decisions in a free environment. The Afghan nation will not follow the American agenda as it is not in harmony with our national ethos and traditions. We will fight till occupation forces vacate our land. We are a free people and know how to win our freedom." Mullah Omar stands firm on his commitment, as he pronounced recently that "the moment of defeat of the invaders has arrived due to the great sacrifices of the Mujahideen. We will continue with our strategy to engage the enemy in an exhausting war of attrition and wear them out like the former Soviet Union. The more the war prolongs, the greater will be the enemy's suffering." There is no denying the fact that Taliban have won against the combined forces of the US and their allies. . Read Full Post
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